But What Will I Do? What Can I Do?

The crisis is upon us, then. Though I've known for quite a while now, I don't know what to do. I don't have a plan. My mind keeps running in loops; all my thoughts begin with 'what if', and everything is suddenly a fear.

He's so far away...too far for me to walk, or ride a bike. What will I do without oil? What will I do if I can't bus to him? I can't throw away the two years I've spent with my first love just because of this complication. I need to figure out something to keep him in my life, and not just over the phone or the internet. I need to find a way to continue to be with him, to see his smile and to hold his hand.

No, it goes beyond this. It goes beyond my social life. My school is fifty kilometers from my house. It takes me at least thirty minutes to get there without traffic by bus, and with graduating in less than two months, what will I do if I can't make it to school any more?

Not to mention, daddy's in Britain on a business trip. What if he can't make it home? What will happen then? What will happen to his entire career without oil?

Something must be done, and I feel like I must do something about it. All my life I have been hearing that we are the generation that will 'save us'; that will drag us out of the hole we've collectively dug. If we've used up all of our rescourses, we can't just sit around and wait for someone to find something else.

Now is the time for action, before it's too late. Maybe this isn't the beginning of the end, maybe it's just a whole new beginning.

Introductions?

When I was young, I always thought of it as such an honor, such a right of passage. I daydreamed about it so often; what kind of car I would get, all the places I would go, all the things I would do. Now that I have it, my car sits lonesome in the driveway. I went through all the motions, took the tests, took the lessons, and bought the car, but now it just sits there. I can't afford to really drive it anywhere.

I live in a small town. So small, that I can walk anywhere I need to go within my town. However, my town is so small that there really isn't anywhere of particular interest to visit. I bus nearly anywhere I need to go. I'm in a bit of a cut-off location, so it takes some time to get anywhere else, but it's all I can do to get out and enjoy myself. Even busfare is rising, though. My boyfriend lives in the city, 50 or 60 kilometers away, so I bus to see him every weekend. Life's busy though, and I can't make it up so often any more. For the past few months I've been wishing that things will settle down.

I'm a senior in highschool now, and I cannot wait to graduate in just a few months.

Things just keep getting crazier and crazier, and though I want all the trouble to end, a part of me can't wait to see where it'll take us.